30 Things Life Taught Me Before Turning 30
Well, it is finally here. My victory lap in my twenties is rapidly coming to an end, and I am closing the chapter on one of the most transformative decades of my life. It seems silly to say when there are still so many years ahead of me. Yet, I am reflective of the past ten years and how they have shaped me into the person that I am today. So, without further ado, here are the thirty things that life has taught me before turning 30.
1. It's a decade of lessons
Our twenties set the scene for what’s to come. It’s the first glimpse of life on our own, the years we start to become who we want to be, not just who we’ve been told to be.
In my twenties, I had moments where I thought I was the smartest person in the room... and moments where I realized I had no clue what I was doing. When I started my career, I felt like I had to be an expert and always have the answers about work, life, everything. But eventually, I realized no one has it all figured out. We’re all just learning as we go. And that’s not only okay, it’s human.
2. Love comes in many forms
Honestly, a lot of my early twenties felt lonely. I’d watch people around me find love and wonder why it wasn’t happening for me. But then something shifted. I started noticing the abundance of love that was in my life; the friends who showed up, the family who cheered me on, the people who invested their time and energy into me. Love isn’t just romantic. It’s presence. It's a connection. It’s being seen. And when I recognized that, everything changed.
3. Resets are a must
I’ve been hustling since I was 15. For the longest time, I equated success with always working— long hours, late nights, burning the candle at both ends. But that kind of hustle isn’t sustainable. It wears you down. I’ve learned that resets are not just okay; they’re essential. I no longer feel guilty for taking a Saturday to do absolutely nothing. Because rest isn’t laziness, it’s fuel. Without it, burnout creeps in. And burnout bleeds into everything.
4. Being weird is cool
Everyone’s a little weird. But somewhere along the way, we start hiding it. We bury the quirks and passions that once brought us joy.
In my late twenties, I started coming back to those childhood loves; the silly, creative, joyful things that made me feel like me. Because being weird is cool. And the happiest people I know are the ones who never stopped doing what made them feel alive.
5. We can be all the things that we want to be
I’ve lived many lives in the past ten years. And I think we all do, we’re constantly evolving.
My twenties were a time of exploration. I tried on different careers, chased hobbies, and said “yes” to things just to see what would happen. I turned a little side hustle into a full-blown photography business, capturing weddings and families across the country. I opened a pop-up bar in my hometown because I believed Clinton needed a space for people to gather. That pop-up turned into a bookstore café, a new chapter entirely.
And when it was time to slow down, I returned to writing. Something I’ve loved since childhood. I wrote and published three books in my twenties. I’m not saying all this as a flex. I’m saying it because we don’t have to limit ourselves. We get one life. Why not try everything that calls to us? You don’t have to stay in one lane. You can pivot. You can reinvent. You can be all the things you want to be.
6.The Best Revenge…. is none.
This one took me a while to realize.
Unfortunately, the words that were whispered in the high school hallways followed me into adulthood. They even showed up in the early days of my career. At first, I used them as fuel to do better, to be better. But eventually, I grew tired of carrying that weight. I’ve learned that karma is real. It works on its own timeline. And I don’t need to interfere. The best revenge is no revenge. It’s peace. It’s growth. It’s living the life I always dreamed of.
7. The world is meant to be explored.
When we travel, we expand our understanding of the world.
New places. New people. New ways of thinking. It’s humbling to realize the world doesn’t operate or think the same way we do, and that’s a beautiful thing. And the photos and memories we collect along the way? Timeless.
8. Life is forever changing
After I graduated college, I fell into a slump.College had felt like a prime chapter of life; surrounded by friends, minimal responsibilities, and so much possibility. Transitioning into the “real world” was jarring.Then, just when things started to feel steady in my mid-twenties, COVID hit. Life flipped again.
And that’s the thing, life is always changing. We won’t always feel happy or sad. Some days will be amazing. Some will knock the breath out of us. But without change, we wouldn’t grow.
9. Success looks different for everybody
Growing up, I had a very specific picture of what success looked like: Go to college. Land a high-paying job. Work hard. Buy nice things. But early into my career, I realized that image didn’t fit me.
Success isn’t a one-size-fits-all formula. My version of success might not look like yours— and that’s okay. We’re all on our own timeline. We all get to define success for ourselves.
10. I’m completely capable and deserving of love
As raw as it sounds, I’ve always struggled with the idea of being loved. I craved it for most of my life, but deep down, I didn’t believe I was worthy of receiving it. I often felt like a mender. Someone who helped others heal. Someone who cleaned up the broken pieces, made them shiny and new... only to watch them walk away.
It felt like I was never meant to be the one who got to keep the love.It took years of self-reflection to shift that mindset. Our thoughts can be the best and worst part of us. But something clicked when I was 28.
I stopped chasing validation. I started recognizing the love that was already around me. And I finally understood: I am completely capable and deserving of love. I always have been.
11. You can totally travel with a carry on
I used to be one of those who felt the need to always check my bag when flying. But after hearing horrendous baggage claim and lost stories from people one summer, I packed just a carry on for a ten day trip to Italy… and the rest is history.
12. Just eat the damn cookie, okay
Yes, health is important. In fact, I spent the majority of my twenties learning how to take care of my body. And what I can say after many cycles of gym obsessions, falling off the wagon, and repeat - it’s not an overnight thing. It takes years to build a sustainable lifestyle when it comes to health. And if you want to eat the damn cookie, you should, okay.
13. Sing the songs, dance the dance
Music is the best form of therapy. And dancing with your best friends, whether it be on the dance floor or on your make believe world tour in the living room….. it’s just good for the soul.
14. Read things that change your perspective
I like to mix things up. I want to see things from other perspectives and one of the best ways to do so is by reading things that will help you see a new light. Just because we were told to believe one thing growing up, doesn’t mean we always have to hold onto that belief.
15. I’m a barista
I’ve spent the last couple years of my twenties doing something real serious. Learning how to make the perfect latte. Studying the art of espresso. I love all things coffee. Lattes. Iced. Hot, with ice cream. I even love, dare I say it, decaf coffee.
16. There is no shame in bedtime at 9:00 pm
Honestly, sleep is the real glow-up. Give me comfy clothes and a show I’ve already watched three times, and I’m living the dream.
17. Grief is just a form of love
Early into my twenties, my family and I unexpectedly lost my grandmother. It was so sudden and honestly took me years to process. The stages of grief are real and I can say that the yearning to see someone you’ve lost never goes away truly. We learn to do life without them, but we never forget them. We just end up seeing them in little glimmers of our lives. When people tell me a story about my grandmother or say the miss her, it’s a nice sentiment. It still makes me feel connected to her still.
18. Our words matter
The words we say to others matter. Throughout my twenties, I have had to really work on how I process and respond to others. It’s very easy to fly off the handle when we are upset. But when emotions are high, we often say things that we don’t always mean. We never know what others are going through. And I don’t want to be burned in the back of someone’s mind as the jerk who said mean things to them.
19. Friends are Everything
You know what? I don’t believe we are meant to do this life alone. Our friends should be the ones we get to celebrate all of the highs and lows with. These days it feels like my circle is smaller….but I know that the group of people who are in it always have my back, while also keeping me in line.
20. Social media is good and bad
My generation has grown up with social media. And one day, we’ll look back and realize that nearly our entire lives were scrapbooked on the internet.
Only time will tell how that affects us. Social media does have its benefits, but these days I try to keep it casual. As wild as it sounds, I’m trying to unlearn posting and focus on living. Some things are meant to stay in the moment, not on a screen. So if I do post, I want it to radiate love. Sorry, trolls.
21. Write the stories down
Those wild stories you and your friends retell over and over? Write them down.
Some of my favorite memories from my twenties became inspiration for characters and plotlines I’ve published. I journaled nonstop throughout the decade; so much that I turned those entries into a book called All Roads Lead You Here. It comes out on September 9, 2025.
22. Tell me something good
The world is chaotic.But there’s still so much good, we just don’t always see it in the headlines. That’s why I try to write down one good thing that happens each day. Something small. Something funny. Something kind.Because when you start looking for the good, you begin to see it everywhere.
23. Take the photos.
Snap the picture. Even if it’s just on your phone. Even if you don’t think you look your best. As a documentary photographer, I can’t tell you how often I hear, “We haven’t had family photos in years.”
Our photos tell the stories of our lives. They become proof we were here—and that we loved well. Some of my favorite photos are of my grandparents in their younger days. Take the photo.
24. We Should Give Back
When I was growing up, my grandmother used to say, “To whom much is given, much is expected.”
That quote has stuck with me for as long as I can remember. It lives in the back of my mind and shows up often.
I don’t have everything, but I know I have more than I need. Giving back doesn’t always mean money. Sometimes it’s time. Sometimes it’s showing up. Whenever I can, I try to give what I have, even if it’s just attention, energy, or a listening ear.
And as part of All Roads Lead You Here, I’ve decided to donate a portion of the book’s sales to a mental health cause.
Mental health is important and I think America is starting to really see that. I fortunately have had tools and support that have allowed me to focus on my mental health. And I want to be part of making sure others have access to that road too.
25. Manifest It
What do you want in life? Seriously—what do you want? Because here’s the truth: the first step to getting there is you.
You’re the one who can either make it happen… or stand in your own way. Everything I’ve accomplished in my twenties started with belief. If you manifest it, you’ll start to attract people, ideas, and opportunities to help you make it real.
A while back, I found a keychain that says, “Manifest that shit.” I still carry it and I still stand by it.
26. Take the PTO
You work hard. You earn that time off. Don’t let it sit untouched while you burn out.
PTO doesn’t have to mean a big, expensive vacation. It could mean a few days to rest, to reconnect, to reset. Every single time I’ve taken PTO, I’ve come back refreshed and usually full of new ideas
27. Write the Card
In a world of notifications and group texts, a handwritten card is a rare and beautiful thing. It doesn’t take much—a few minutes of your day, a stamp, a little thought.
But it means everything to the person receiving it.I try to send thank you notes, birthday cards, and a holiday card every Christmas. Because people remember when you took the time to show up with your words.
28. I’m letting go of control
I used to be a total control freak, and okay, maybe a little still lingers. But I’ve learned that surprises are going to happen whether I like it or not. Instead of letting them spiral me, I’ve been learning to roll with it.
I can’t control everything. But I can control how I respond.
29. Nobody has it figured out
When I was a kid, I thought adults had it all figured out. Then in my twenties, I thought maybe by thirty I’d know it all.
And here’s what I’ve learned: Nobody knows what they’re doing.
I’ve sat in rooms with CEOs, business owners, and wildly successful people; and they’re all still figuring it out, too.
30. All Roads Lead You Here
We spend so much time chasing the future or clinging to the past.
But what about right now? What about this version of you; who’s been through so much and still keeps going? Every detour, every heartbreak, every surprise, every lesson…It brought you here.
That’s why I titled my new book All Roads Lead You Here. Because they really do.
I’ve heard from many people that your thirties are where things start to feel a little more secure. A little more settled. I’m looking forward to seeing what this next decade brings.
I don’t know what’s in store, but I know I’ll keep doing what I love. Telling stories. Taking photos. Making people feel seen. And I’ll keep trying to bring light into the places that need it.
Pre-order your copy of All Roads Lead You Here and receive it during the release week of September 9, 2025.
